OM WEBBSIDAN

Detta är en sida om Warhammer 40k. Brädspelen, böckerna och plastgubbarna.

För er som inte är bekant med Warhammer 40 k är det som ett framtida fiktivt universum som stjärnornas krig eller star trek.

Om dessa universum hade dragits till 11 och överbefolkats och sedan fallit en medeltid med gudsfruktan och Inquisition. Bara att djävulen och helvetet finns på riktigt.

Och enda statskicket som överlever denna framtid är en stark facistisk diktatur.

För att ge ett exempel på Warhammer 40k universet:

Let me take you through the average Warp travel procedure. The Captain calls down to prep the ship for Warp expedition. At that time, 12000 slaves who have never seen the outside of the work galley begin shoveling the dead bodies of the previous workers into massive furnaces along with whatever hard fuel source they have in storage, like a brutal Mr. Fusion. A field of pure psychic FUCK YOU is generated around the ship and the blinded, mentally traumatized man inside a metal egg begins screaming unendingly as he charts a course through the Warp, which is basically a giant ocean of pure emotion in which Unnamed Ones lounge around and fuck with humanity by the luxury of simply existing. The ship then plows into the miasma of what you could call Hell if you lacked imagination. Pray to the Holy Throne the Astropath doesn’t accidentally get you lost, becomes possessed by a Daemon, or just explodes like a mushy human pinata from the mental stress of being around so much pure CANNOT BE. If the void shields even flicker on the 8000 year old vessel (which no one actually understands completely how to work), Daemons made of RAPE and LEMON JUICE will crawl into our reality and do things you literally cannot imagine to every soul aboard. I mean that. The very notion of understanding the completeness of the horror the human victims will be witness to would shatter your perception of reality and cause your head to explode.

Mission clock says they were only in the Warp for 5 days. It was 17 months for everyone aboard. They also missed their destination by a couple of solar systems and 80% of the crew is dead.

The Captain turns to his bridge staff and pops the cork on a vintage stock of Jherrik Ale and salutes another successful Warp Jump. Welcome to 40K.